Counselor’s Corner - April 13 Issue

Dear Over-Achievers,

Rachel Macy Stout writes the following:

"I’m not certain about much these days, but I do know this:
When there is extra buttermilk, you make cornbread. And I had just enough to make two pans. When the pans came out of the oven, I covered one with a dishcloth, and set it inside a paper bag with handles. I grabbed an unopened container of honey, along with a sympathy card I’d been meaning to send. ‘No meal? That’s it?’ I thought to myself, looking at the ready-to-be-delivered offering sitting on my kitchen counter.
It seemed inadequate for my grieving friend—at least that’s what the Recovering Overachiever in me said. In the past, I would’ve let that demanding voice talk me into going over the top, which would likely lead right into doing nothing.
'Go big or go home' – isn’t that the saying ingrained at an early age?
Lie
Lie
Lie
'Go small and show up.'
That’s truth right there. Go small and show up. That’s how we move through life, ensuring we give ourselves space to breathe and fuel to try. 'Go small and show up.'

That’s what I repeated to myself as I carried the warm bag out to the car. My husband, who was organizing the garage, offered to drive me to my friend’s house.
As the car bounced and the radio played, I wrote a thoughtful note inside the card.
After depositing the treat with a hug and some real talk, I got a message from my friend, confirming my self-sabotaging, overachieving days are dwindling… She’d been curled up on the couch, expressing to her beloved how utterly exhausted she was when I knocked on the door. They’d wasted no time drizzling a slice with honey, to which her husband declared was ‘**ing good’ cornbread. She said the treat made her feel loved, spoiled, and a little less exhausted. She highlighted a line I’d written in her card, calling it a 'pen drop' instead of a mic drop.

'Go small and show up.' That’s truth right there. Because a little honey goes a long way."

Grateful for the 'pen drops' you do every day,
Mindy